Jacob S. essay

1.       What is the claim?

a.       The main point the writer is trying to make, is that starting school later would benefit students, parents, and teachers.

b.      The thesis is clearly stated and there is no suggestion to dig through to try and find the thesis. The thesis is stated clearly at the end of the first paragraph.

2.       What support does the writer offer for the claim?

a.       Reasons to support the claim include teenager’s need more sleep than adults, a later start would lead to increased overall performance, and even safety benefits.

b.      Evidence used to support these reasons are testimonials from educators, and statistics in the form of percentages.

c.       The reasons are plausible, but might not be sufficient or sufficiently sourced. The writer is still lacking a third source.

3.       How evenhandedly does the writer present the issues?

a.       There are mentions of a counterargument, specifically one for cost, and the author acknowledges this argument and then gives an option to fix the problem while giving more support to his main argument.

b.      ^

c.       The author treats counterarguments respectfully, and explains their point of view sufficiently, allowing the reader to form an opinion about both sides.

d.      The writer does engage in generalizations without sources, and creates reasons that, while contextually appropriate, are not supported by evidence.

4.       What authorities or sources of outside information are used?

a.       The author uses each source to support reasons stated in a way that utilizes the subject matter appropriately. Each source is matched with a reason that makes sense, and there does not seem to be a disjoint in the sources and the reasons.

b.      The sources are credible, but the psychology today more so than the other from USA today.

c.       Each source is current, occurring within either this current year, or 2014.

5.       How does the Writer address you as a reader?

a.       The writer assumes that the audience is familiar with the experience of being a student in either high school or college.

b.      The language used by the writer mainly excludes the audience as they mainly use I, instead of we, but they do include the reader at certain areas that are appropriate.

c.       I do feel like the author and I share beliefs regarding the start time of schools. It is fairly clear how the writer feels that the start time of schools should be later for high school students especially, and I definitely agree with that stance, and how the writer states that a later start time would contribute to an overall better student performance.

Patrick K. essay

1.       What is the claim?

a.       The point the writer is trying to make is that video games do not cause violence.

b.      The thesis is stated clearly and firmly in the first paragraph.

2.       What support does the writer offer for the claim?

a.       The author gives reasons including how cooking in a game does not make you a chef, or acting as a lawyer in a game does not actually make you a lawyer, how when a popular game is released the players are actually playing the game and not outside committing violent crimes, and how game ratings should be taken into consideration and become more respected by parents when buying games for their children.

b.      The evidence provided by the author to support these reasons are visual elements like graphs, and testimonials by authorities.

c.       The reasons are plausible and sufficient, although the last reason concerning parents and appropriate game ratings feels disconnected partly, and may need some editing.

3.       How evenhandedly does the author present the issues?

a.       The author mentions a counterargument, but does not give any real specifics concerning the other arguments.

b.      The author mainly acknowledges that there may be a counterargument concerning a specific point and then goes on to refute the claims with reasoning and evidence.

c.       The author responds to counterarguments respectfully.

d.      The arguments are qualified and relevant especially with the current trend of gun violence in the United States.

4.       What authorities or sources of outside information does the writer use?

a.       The author uses each source in a way that relevantly ties them into the writing as a way to support each reason for the overall claim.

b.      Two of the sources are recognizable by name and are credible, while two others are more obscure and cannot bring to mind anything associated with them either positively or negatively concerning their credibility.

c.       Each source is extremely current, all from within the current year.

5.       How does the writer address you as the reader?

a.       The writer seems to assume that the audience or reader already has a position on the topic leaning towards disagreement with the author’s main claim.

b.      The language used by the author mainly excludes the reader, using mostly “I” rather than “we”. The argument reads more as a personal defense for video games rather than an unbiased collection of sources to support a claim.

c.       I don’t know though, if the author and I share any beliefs or attitudes toward the subject as I am inconclusive of my own position towards the topic, although I do tend to believe that games like “Grand Theft Auto”, and “Saints Row” contribute to violence and violent attitudes toward women and specifically sex workers.